Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Medictation Moments | A Lion, No Tiger & Three Bears

Opening up and it wasn't even meditation.

First honesty, I only meditated one day in the last seven. I couldn't face me. I wasn't wanting to look at anything to do with me.

Instead I've been meeting my subconscious in dreamland. I've had some wild and amazing dreams. Aliens, hostile takeovers, moving to New York, drag queens and pancakes.

Last night for instance I dreamt of a lion, 2 chihuahua's and The 3 bears as in Papa bear, Mama bear and Baby bear. The three of them were peeking at me through a screen in a window. It was fun and funny and I wasn't afraid - at all.

Then I was sitting in a room with lots of double swinging doors. I could see outside because the doors were flapping in the breeze. I caught a glimpse of a man and lion playing on the lawn. The first glimpse I thought the man was running from the lion. The second and third glimpse confirmed they were playing.

Now, none of these sets of doors had locks or clasps. The doors all led out to a long and wide veranda which had stairs leading down to the huge expanse of lawn.

I was afraid the lion would get inside. I was afraid the lion would hurt me and eat the chihuahuas. I mentioned there were 2 chihuahuas right?

First one chihuahua pushed it's way through the door. My fear of the lion got stronger. The second chihuahua pushed it's way through the door and then I got really frightened. I started looking around for ways to block the doors.

I didn't see the lion again. I saw the bears again, looking through the window at me and I smiled and woke up.

I go up, started doing my morning things, e-mails, twitter, coffee, chauffer and after I get back, I start reading my RSS feed.

Hmmm, Havi has her Items post up and sends me off to meet Wendy Cholbi at I'm reading and scrolling down the blog and what do I see - Christian The Lion.

I click to watch and wow tears just start gushing from my eyes. I mean I can't control them. I can't stop them. I don't know where they came from. I sob uncontrollably first watching the 1:17 video clip, then the longer clips...

I'm sobbing and wiping my eyes so I can keep watching and gasping for breathe because the sobs are so deep I feel nauseous.

I notice one of my dogs is standing beside me with her head down. I think she's positioned herself in one of her favorite 'pet me here spots'. I start absentmindedly petting her, still sobbing and wiping and gasping and watching.

She looks up at me and then back down. As I push my chair back to see what she's staring at I notice she has calmly, regurgitated her morning treats, directly between my feet. Nothing is on either shoe and my own nauseau is gone.

She calmly walks away and leaves me with the mess of tears, running nose and dog vomit.

I think, yeah this is the weirdest thing yet, who needs medictation?

Oh and that one day of medictation lasted for seven minutes and all I kept getting was my to do list for the day. I sort of suspected that might be the case and it was valid non-meditative feedback because I needed to be productively active that day.

You can watch the videos of Christian, The Lion below.

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